I always feel like I spend way too much time dwelling on what people say, or even what they think. Especially when it's about me. I don't know, but lately I've just felt really.. uncertain, about mostly everything. Well, I honestly have been struggling SO much with this whole end of mine and my best friends friendship. I guess I just don't exactly understand how someone gave up on me so easily. And I don't understand it even now. Especially when you've done all you possibly could for that person, and they just stop caring. I literally put a lot of things on hold for him. And it hurt when he gave up on me. Maybe just because I couldn't think of doing that to him.
So, I've really been trying to be grateful lately, for a lot in my life. (in spite of thanksgiving)
And I've found it really hard. Especially because I'm having such a hard time letting go of him. And of the friendship we had. And then one day, I was on We Heart It and I saw this one picture and it was of a book, and what it said. And I realized it applied to me SO much. It actually made me really happy.
"I was, but then I realized that I was holding on to something that didn't exist anymore. That the person I missed didn't exist anymore. People change. The things we like and dislike change. And we can wish they wouldn't all day long, but that never works."
Like, this applies to my life more than anyone will ever know. So being a girl, I posted it on instagram. Then, two girls commented asking what the book was. I didn't know, so I decided to google the quote, and yep. I found it. :) It's called 'Fixing Delilah'. Also, next to the book on the reviews side it said, "rich with emotion, this book delivers a powerful story of family, love and self-discovery." I looked it up in my school library, and ran to school today and found the book and immediately checked it out. I never read, but I was honestly so very happy about this.
Because quite frankly, I believe I need to find myself. And I sure hope this book will help me.
"Be done with it. you have done what you could.
some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget
them as soon as you can."